Tuesday, January 08, 2008

January 2009 Administration

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Imagine that it is January, 2009 and the presidential elections are over.
Suppose all of the candidates that were involved in the New Hampshire debates had some place in the administration. What would be their positions?
Bear with me....
  • President - Mitt Romney - it's good to have someone who has more than government experience in running things... because no one can actually run the government
  • Vice President - Fred Thompson - he can take all the time he needs with this job, but he'll get things done behind the scenes... gravitas counts
  • Secretary of State - Rudy Giuliani - he doesn't like the pussy footing so let's see how he handles the Middle East... besides, he may be connected
  • Secretary of Defense - John McCain - really, now, who else?
  • Secretary of Labor - John Edwards - true to his roots and he still doesn't have to give up his $400 haircuts
  • Secretary of Agriculture - Hillary Clinton - who knows more about pork?
  • Secretary of Education - Mike Huckabee - if the law says to educate, he will see it happens no matter how high the taxes have to be raised
  • Secretary of Energy [aka Secretary of Dismantling Domestic Automobile Manufacturers] - Bill Richardson - he knows how to do it because he did it even if he couldn't make it happen
  • Secretary of Homeland Security - Ron Paul - no foreign entanglements... or affairs... or landscapers... build the damn wall! and bring home the troops... shut the doors... lock the windows....
  • Secretary of Health and Human Services - Barack Obama - he'll take care of all of us and we'll all feel good about it because he talks sooooooooo sooooooooothingly.
Did I leave anyone out?

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